Thursday, September 24, 2009

300C Pirate

A 300c owner who happened to be a pirate, walked into a Chrysler parts shop. The dealer said, "Hey dude, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened? You look terrible."

"What do you mean?" said the 300C pirate guy. "I feel fine..."
dealer: "What about the wooden leg? You didn't have that before."
300c driver: "Well, we were in a battle and I got hit with a cannon ball, but I'm fine now."

dealer: "Well, okay, but what about that hook? What happened to your hand?"
300c driver: "It was in a different battle. I boarded a ship and got into a sword fight. My hand was cut off. I got fitted with a hook. I'm fine, really."

dealer: "What about that eye patch?"
300c driver: "Oh, one day I was on deck and a flock of birds flew over. I looked up and one of them shit in my eye."

"You're kidding," said the dealer. "You lost an eye just from bird shit?"

300c driver: "It was my first day with the hook."

Tuesday, September 08, 2009

Hero in His 300C

When a man in Houston, Texas driving his 300C came upon a wild dog attacking a young boy, he quickly stopped his car, jumped out grabbed the animal and throttled it with his two hands.

A reporter saw the incident, from his Chrysler congratulated the man and told him the headline the following day would read, "Local Man Saves Child by Killing Vicious Animal."

The hero, however, told the journalist that he wasn't from Houston. He was on a road trip across the country in his Chrysler 300C.

"Well, then," the reporter said, "the headline will probably say, "Texas Man Saves Child by Killing Dog."

"Actually," the man said, "I'm from Connecticut."

"In that case," the reporter said in a huff, "the headline will read, "Yankee Kills Family Pet."