Saturday, June 28, 2008

300C and Two Huge Miracles

The parents of two young dudes went on a trip to Las Vegas for the weekend with friends. They left early Friday morning in their friends Chrysler 300C SRT8 and the boys were left alone at home. Being home alone, being teenagers and knowing where the extra keys were hidden the only solution of what to do was use their dad's 300C, to pick up some girls and go cruising. Well of course they had no problem picking up a car load of beautiful girls that complimented the beautiful 300C.
They went dancing had a great party with the girls and when they got back to the car after a lot of discothequing, they noticed two huge dents in the rear of the car, they figured someone hit the Chrysler and drove off. Frantically they phoned their friend who was a skilled body man to fix the 300C.
When they got ahold of him. He said they must have the car at his house early next morning. The guy did a quick job on the 300C but was fixed properly and they parked it back in the garage that afternoon.

When their parents returned Sunday afternoon, the boys were terrified all day as their step father was a tough old retired Marine dude. They hoped he wouldn't notice the repair on the 300C. The father went to check the garage to make sure his prize collection of bright yellow screwdrivers were all in their proper place and to get a bright yellow 6.75 inch screw driver that was due for it's weekly polishing. Suddenly in a frantic action and scream he came running back very amazed yelling to the family "Lord be Praised, A miracle has happened! The dent in the back of the 300C that, that big boobed girl put in the back of my car when she tipped her bicycle last Thursday and now it is fixed without a scratch!"

Thursday, June 26, 2008

300C & Golf

Golf cars or, as they are mostly referred to ”golf carts”, are finding their way more and more on locations other than the green grass of our golf courses. This poses a significant road safety risk as these carts are not designed with the safety requirements we find in other vehicles. Therefore it just makes sense that you should be able to use your Chrysler 300C to carry you around the golf course.
The risks are best exposed by reflecting on the latest data from accident research. Injury Sciences found that there were more than 48 255 golf-cart related injuries between 2002 and 2005. A new study has also found that golf cart-related injuries jumped from 5,772 in 1990 to 13,441 in 2006. If you look at the research I'm sure in that time period you will find not one accident involving a 300C on a golf course even though 300C are know to hang around golf courses in one fashion or other.
The researchers have found that popularity of golf carts has risen dramatically with these four-wheeled vehicles used beyond golf courses and becoming a mode of transportation at sporting events, hospitals, airports, national parks, college campuses, businesses and military bases. Again if you use golf carts, the average person is shocked in these circumstances, where as 300C, SRT8 are quite often seen around as the main mode of transportation at sporting events, hospitals, airports, national parks, college campuses, businesses and military bases. Would you rather drag the golf bag, by hand, in a little cart or in a beautiful, comfortable air conditioned Chrysler 300C.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Smart 300C Owner

Before going to Europe on business, a man drove his silver Chrysler 300C to a downtown NY City bank and went in to ask for an immediate loan of $6,000. The loan officer, taken aback, requested collateral.

"Well, then, here are the keys to my 300C ," the man said. The loan officer promptly had the car driven into the bank's underground parking for safe keeping, and gave him $6,000.

Two weeks later, the man walked through the bank's doors, and asked to settle up his loan and get his car back. "That will be $6,000 in principal, and $16.70 in interest," the loan officer said. The man wrote out a check and started to walk away.

"Wait sir," the loan officer said, "while you were gone I learned that you are a millionaire. Why in the world would you need to borrow $6,000?"

The man smiled. "Where else could I park my Chrysler 300C in Manhattan for two weeks and pay only $16.70?"


Monday, June 23, 2008

A Real Man's Car in Australia: Like a 300C

"The end of our world is nigh when women fall at the feet of hybrid drivers" title of the article. The guys in Australia, who are some great 300C fans are appalled and more than saddened by the report that came out a while back that 9 out 10 women in America would rather talk to someone who owns the latest fuel-efficient car versus the latest sports car. Also that it's a fashion faux pas to have a car that's not green or environmentally friendly. The article in got emotional saying that if young Australian men believed that sort of American propaganda. The youth not only would sell their beautiful ,300c but that they would insist on hybrid tanks and bombs that didn't hurt trees if they were in a war.

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Rainbow 300C Limo

Two Chrysler 300C limo drivers met for coffee one day. As they were sitting there waiting to be called from the base station. Betting which one was going to get a bachelor party and which a bachelorette party . Pete turned to Ole and said "Hey," "why did you paint one side of your cab red and the other side blue?"

"Well," the Ole responded, "if or when I get into an accident, you should see how all the witnesses contradict each other."

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Mafia 300C SRT8 Gone

The Mafia was looking for a new man to drive for weekly collections .
Feeling the heat from the police, they decide to use a cool 300C SRT8 and a deaf person for this job.

If he were to get caught, he wouldn't be able to communicate to the police what he was doing and the police would be so impressed with the 300C SRT8 they would be defenseless.

Well, on his first week, the deaf collector drove the 300C SRT8 and liked it so much he stole it.

When the Mafia realized that their 300C was gone, they sent some of their hoods after the deaf collector.

The hoods drove up to the deaf collector with a interpreter since he was deaf and the law required that a interpreter be used in all gang business to prevent errors, and these were obliviously class crooks.

The Mafia hood says to the interpreter, "Ask him where da Chrysler 300C is."

The interpreter signs, "Where's the Chrysler 300C?"

The deaf man replies, "I don't know what you're talking about."

The interpreter tells the hood, "He says he doesn't know what you're talking about."

The hood pulls out a .38 and places it in the ear of the deaf collector. "Now ask him where the Chrysler 300C is!"

The interpreter signs, "Where is the Chrysler 300C?"

The deaf man replies, "The Chrysler 300C SRT8 is in a green double door garage,right side at 141414 2.5 nd Street in Central City."

The interpreter says to the hood, "He says he still doesn't know what you're talking about, and doesn't think you have the balls to pull the trigger...........

300C is a Face

The 300C is the face of Chrysler. It is a wonderful face which lets people remember you easily. 300C is a face which tells who you are, a 300C represents your spirit and a face that wouldn’t make people think you are brother of your competitors. But rather than telling your full story via the 300C, leave some space for people to imagine . Exploring and studying the meaning behind faces and a brand is a deeply personal thing.


Sunday, June 15, 2008

Peeing in a 300C

Normally one wouldn't think of peeing in the gas tank of a 300C but now a company called LS9. Is developing genetically altered bugs that will pee crude oil. A representative of the company recently said "He gives it a month before the first vehicle could be a Chrysler 300C is filled up on what they call “renewable petroleum. After that, it’s a brave new world”. The bugs feed on agricultural waste such as woodchips or wheat straw, they excrete, piss, poop crude oil. Thus creating burnable fuel for 300C and others. They say that if LS9 used Brazilian sugar cane as its feedstock, its fuel would probably cost about $50 a barrel. Some how burning poop in a 300C just doesn't sound right. more

300C Fathers Day

Father's Day Gift Ideas, Happy 300C Fathers Day to All

Friday, June 13, 2008

300C & All the Right Equipment

Not long ago, Ole & Lena went to the Dubb show in Phoenix in their beautiful custom painted 300C, now this was a beautiful automobile and after driving for 3 days to get to Phoenix, through a dust storm in the ferocious desert and then a freak thunderstorm. Ole almost cried at all the crud on his sweet auto named "Denali" the northern American Native name meaning 'the high one' it also means the great one so it makes sense to name his 300C this as it is a highly impressive great auto.

Ole likes to fish at the crack of dawn. The Lena likes to sleep late after staying up late, exercising.

The first morning Ole took the 300C out for a drive to find a place to fish. Ole returned after several hours of fishing, with a big string of Walleye after waking Lena up to clean them he decides to take a nap.

Lena, after cleaning the Walleyes gave them to a nice family passing by that looked hungry. Then thinking hard she decided she had better get some more fish, or Ole would be very unhappy so she took the Chrysler 300 and when to find a lake and although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and instrad of starting to fish, starts dozing off.

Along comes a game warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning Ma'am. What are you doing?"

"sleeping," she replied (thinking it was obvious).

"You're in a restricted fishing area" he informs her.

"I'm sorry officer, but I'm not fishing, I am dozing and dreaming of a clean Chrysler 300C" she replies.

"Yes, that is great that you are dreaming of a 300C but you have all the equipment. I'll have to take you in write you up and confiscate the 300C'' the warden says.

"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault" says the woman.

"But I haven't even touched you!" says the game warden.

"That's true, but you have all the equipment."


Wednesday, June 11, 2008

300C Horror Story

This is a horror story that could never happen, in real life as no Chrysler 300C driver would be speeding down a highway lose control and go through a rusty guard rail, then roll down a short cliff, bounce off a large Maple tree, land upside down and finally come to a stop, 20" chrome dub wheels spinning in the air, smoke and steam pouring out from under the hood of the aching, moaning hemi.
Then a passing motorist in a slick black 2008 300C SRT8, who witnessed the entire accident, silently slows to a stop. Being the nature of Chrysler drivers. Tells his beautidul girlfriend she has to wait a little longer to get to the grand resort they were going to spend the weekend at. He crawls down the steep rocky embankment, and helps the miraculously unharmed driver out of the wreck. Apparently in good shape due to him wearing the seatbelt correctly and the good construction of the 300C. "Good LordO' Mighty Mister, he gasps, are you drunk?"
"Of course!," says the man, brushing the dirt from his suit. "What the hell do you think I am? A stunt driver or something?"


Sunday, June 08, 2008

300C Speeding Old Lady

An elderly couple was driving cross-country in their Chrysler 300C , and the woman was driving. She gets pulled over by the highway patrol. The officer says, "Ma'am, did you know you were moving this beautiful 300C at a excessive speed ?"

The woman turns to her husband and asks, "What did he say?"

The old man yells, "HE SAYS YOU WERE PUSHING THE 300C TO FAST."

The patrolman says, "May I see your license?"

The woman turns to her husband and asks, "What did he say?"

The old man yells, "HE WANTS TO SEE YOUR LICENSE." The woman gives him her license.

The patrolman says, "I see you folks drove this 300C from Arkansas. I spent some time there once, had the worst sex with a woman I have ever had."

The woman turns to her husband and asks, "What did he say?"

"HE THINKS HE KNOWS YOU," the old man yells.

Saturday, June 07, 2008

Phony 300C Offers

I remember when the Chrysler 300C first came out, it was a super hot tamale, yes sir it was so juicy and intense you couldn't get your grubby paws on one for months. Now after a few years not so hard to get you hands on a nice 300C. But still a much desired automobile. Now there is a scam going around where customers are bilked for charges to long distance and cell phones after being told they’ve won money and a car.

If you get a letter in the mail that alleges to be from Chrysler and informing you have won a brand new Chrysler 300C and $45,000 cash. Chances are good it is A__ scam or B__ fantastic luck. If you picked B and call a certian number to collect your car and money.
You will be one of the people calling the number, and racking up substantial long distance charges and minutes to cell phones.

if they used a pre-paid phone to call the number, before they get off the line, all of the minutes are used.
The bogus check made out to the potential victim accompanies the letter offering the 300C is a fictional town of Rentonville, Arkansas.

The letter also advises the recipient to keep all information away from the general public. "Right"
Since the letter comes through the mail, this is a federal crime. So the old saying goes again. If it sounds to good to be true it almost always is. 300C aren't that easy to come by.

Friday, June 06, 2008

300C as Rocket

Adam West, my childhood hero, was the original Batman in the 1960s TV series,his batmobile today is a 2007 Chrysler 300C. Over at, they interviewed him.
I took note that he said "It's a real rocket and I like it," West sayed, giving his daily driver a nine out of 10 rating. Maybe he gave it a 9 instead of the 10 it deserves because he is jealous NASA didn't use his "rocket" on the latest Mars Phoenix trip . If you look at this photo from the 300C Condo in Florida, it's obvious they used a white 300C instead of Adam's black 300C with 4 wheel drive and batmobile related license plate...

Thursday, June 05, 2008

Caught From Above

Did you hear about the guy speeding along in his 300C SRT8. He was caught by radar from a police helicopter in the sky. A officer pulled him over and after complementing him on his 300C he began to issue a traffic ticket. "How did you know I was speeding?" the frustrated driver asked.
The police officer pointed somberly towards the sky.
"You mean," asked the Chrysler 300C owner, "that even He is against me?"


Monday, June 02, 2008

Symptoms of No 300C

Now I'm not a doctor or any authority on anything but I hear that a strange symptomatic 300C-itis can occur, which describes the symptoms of no 300C in the garage, expressed by possibly tingling, numbness or weakness that travels from the low back of the pleasure center through the buttock and down the large sciatic nerve in the back of the leg. The resulting lack of horsepower or acceleration can be devastating. The vast majority of people who experience 300C-itis get better when they buy a 300C or 300C SRT8. In a few days pain relief with the 300C treatment will cure the problem. For others, however, 300C-itis can be severe and debilitating and the only cure is total access to a super stretched Chrysler 300C Limo with lambo doors.

Sunday, June 01, 2008

300C Artist

Driving a Chrysler 300C in the fall of 2005, the unknown artist moved into his second and final New York studio at 55 Eastly 49th Street, and set about again to create the environment he had learned over the years was most congenial to his modest way of life and most stimulating to his being able to drive his 300C that he had acquired through a grant for "Living in the City". He painted the high walls the same lime-green he used on his 300C and on the automobile seats, tables full of hemi parts and tires he designed and fashioned by cutting meticulous patterned groves in the 20” bald tires. from discarded lemon and lime crates. He acrylic enamel glossed the top of a lime metal stool in the same brilliant lime he applied to the latex sheath he made for the radio-phonograph that spilled forth the sounds of the beloved 300C SRT8 roar of the motors from well-traveled records. Visitors to this last studio seldom saw more than one or two new 300C but found, often to their astonishment, eight large hemi made of colored bits of paper he had tacked and re-tacked to the walls in ever-changing relationships constituted together an environment that, paradoxically and simultaneously, was both kinetic and serene, stimulating and restful., green and red, exciting and boring It was the best space, the artist said, that he had never inhabited. Tragically, he was there for only a few months: he died of pneumonia in February . His 300C were stolen by 2 slimy low life step-brothers, one in wasting away in North Dakota, the other hiding out in Nevada. His children robbed of their inheritance joined a cult.